Wednesday, July 29, 2015

The Gift of Summer Boredom



I remember my childhood summers fondly. Days in which I would leave the house after a still sleepy, leisurely breakfast of cereal that I made myself and come home only for lunch in the middle of a day spent entirely outdoors. We did not live in town and, thus, playmates were limited to siblings and the cousins who lived down the road. Our backyard became the playground in which our imaginations would run wild- turning those few acres into magical forests, the tiny creek into a raging river and our trusty dog, Rex, played the many roles of horse, monster and any other creature that we children did not want to play. By the dreaded end of the three months of summer break we were tan from our hours in the sun, full of the memories of a thousand magical moments and bonded to our siblings in a way that winter’s forced hibernation never seemed to connect us. 





Today, I live on the same acreage that I did as a child. My children have the blessing of having the same grassy patches to scratch their bare feet as they run through it, the same creek to stomp through and catch tadpoles, and not the same dog, but their very own energetic pup to imagine away the days with.

However this is not the same world as twenty, thirty years ago. There are screens everywhere in the house to demand attention- televisions with hundreds of channels, computers with access to a thousand entertaining sites, tablets stocked with apps. There is also no longer the expectation of a stretch of an unscheduled three months. Their school friends tell competitive stories of elaborate vacations, spending time weekly traveling to all of the local attractions- various parks, the zoo, the science center, all the festivals, which come breezing through town. On the very first day of school they will be asked to list their favorite activities of the summer and no longer are the lists filled with things like finding old barn wood to make a bridge over a creek or a day spent in imaginative play with their siblings.



nature mindfulness childhood

Our children have become used to being entertained every minute. In our house, we have limits on electronics and kick the kids outside on a nice day just as our parents did before us. Yet, the new cry of childhood seems to be “I’m bored”, which is certainly not a new childhood expression but now has seemed to have morphed to not really just mean “I’m bored”, but “Please find something to entertain me, as I no longer can entertain myself even for a short period of time”.

We have made a choice in this household to do what is no longer expected of children in many households. We refuse to spend our days scheduling our children’s every hour. There will be many days with no plans at all, when they will be sent outside with only the grass and the trees and their own imaginations to entertain them.
nature childhood mindfulness




The screens will be turned off and our children will find that times of quiet can be just as entertaining, or even more so, than brightly colored graphics and cloying music leaping off of a screen. They will bond with their brother and sister, making memories that they will replay in their minds well into adulthood. Even though sunscreen will be religiously applied, they will leave summer with a glow on their skin, which will also sport the bruises that scrapes that come from climbing trees, stomping through creeks and chasing the dog the field.

nature childhood mindfulness



This summer I will be giving my children the greatest gift of all- boredom. For inside boredom is the gift of getting to know your own mind, of finding solace and joy in nature and in the realization that the greatest gifts are experiences, not things. And, maybe- just maybe, on that first day of school list my children will write at the very top of the list one of the simple joys found in a summer’s day spend outdoors, no screen in site.


nature childhood mother


41 comments:

  1. What a lovely post! Thank you for sharing your wisdom...

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  2. I totally agree! That's how I grew up too! Thanks for helping me remember some of my childhood!

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  3. "Yet, the new cry of childhood seems to be “I’m bored”, which is certainly not a new childhood expression but now has seemed to have morphed to not really just mean “I’m bored”, but “Please find something to entertain me, as I no longer can entertain myself even for a short period of time”." What an insightful point. Great post!

    Betty
    http://vodkaandimpropriety.com

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  4. Its hard to listen to the "I'm bored." I think we have all given at some point. Its worth it in the end.

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    1. I so agree, Catherine. It is very hard, but worth it:

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  5. We have limits on screen time, too. I love the idea of using boredom for self-discovery. It is a lesson that will serve our children well later in life.

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    1. Good for you on screen time limits, S Marie.. It is an importantly lesson!

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  6. Ugh our summers are so hard living in Phoenix. We can't go outside. My son is an only child needing constant attention. We all get bored stuck inside all day. But sometimes I'm grateful for the TV and the tablet if it keeps him entertained if only for a little while.

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    1. That sounds miserable! Best of luck to you!

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  7. Ugh our summers are so hard living in Phoenix. We can't go outside. My son is an only child needing constant attention. We all get bored stuck inside all day. But sometimes I'm grateful for the TV and the tablet if it keeps him entertained if only for a little while.

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  8. Yes, I was talking about this the other day with friends, heaven forbid I tell me son to "play with his toys". A I type this he is on my tablet. I need to learn from you.

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    1. We can all learn from each other! Parenting is hard. Good luck!

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  9. Awww, this made me feel so nostalgic! I'm really hoping my girls will grow up playing outside using their imaginations. TV, phones and tablets are good in their place but nothing beats playing outside!

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    1. If you want them to, they will Tori!

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  10. I feel like this was written for me! We recently moved from a small apartment in a not so good part of town to a wide open space in Texas. It is hard to transition to more outside play but we are working hard on it.

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    1. It can certainly be a challenge to make changes. Good luck!

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  11. This is so great. I feel you hit the nail right on the head. I have a cousin who has her children observe No-Tech Tuesday so they are encouraged to spend more time outside and not sitting right in front of a screen. I hope to be like you when my littles are older (I just have a four-month-old presently). :)

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    1. I love the idea of No Tech Tuesday's! Thanks for sharing!

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  12. My summers were spent exactly the same way! You only need wide open spaces and an imagination to travel whereever your mind can take you. Thank you so much for sharing over at the Country Fair Blog Party! Check back at the end of the month to see who each host picked as their Purple Ribbon Winners.
    Laurie - Co-Host

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  13. Your childhood sounds similar to mine and my friends and I still long for those days all these years later! I can't tell you how much I agree with your philosophy and what a tremendous service you are doing your children! XO

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  14. I love this! I'm so guilty of busy summers, but of course it's really the only time we have my stepson, and so it is the only time that as a whole family can visit other family like grandparents in other cities and states. The time at home I try to keep them active and practicing for the school year to come (I suppose it's the vet teacher in me). We have a literary focus, and i feel utter guilt if I'm not providing entertainment. I really put too much on my own shoulders. This is fantastic! Thank you!

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  15. I so agree with all you have written. Fortunately,my grandson has parents who are teaching him to enjoy the outdoors and not be stuck in front of the screen for entertainment. Ethan is 3 but has such a wonderful imagination and I get swept up in this when I mind him each Wednesday. We have so much fun discovering the world around us together. Do you know you can look at ants or lizards for at least 30 minutes? He has taught me this LOL:) Enjoy your summer with your children
    Sue from Sizzling Towards 60 & Beyond

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  16. I love your approach to parenting. I think your kids will be the better for it.
    Carol

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  17. I grew up in the East end of London and my summers were spent playing outdoors in the streets on my bike or playing cricket, football (soccer)!or rounders .... my children are growing up in a small village in the country and they too spend their time playing outdoors, especially my younger one - he is always out on his bike, whatever the weather. I'm so glad he is like that! 😊

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  18. I'm lucky that as much as my daughter loves her iPad, she also enjoys running around and playing outside. This summer we are buying gymnastics equipment for our backyard so she can run around and flip all day long.

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  19. Great post. You are so fortunate to be able to live in the same place your whole life, and I'm sure it will mean a lot to their children when they grow old enough to realize it. I am a marine brat, so I've never had one "home" or lived in the same place as my folks. however, I can definitely relate to your point of how much technology has changed the world. I don't want my future kids to be the ones choosing an i-pad over a book!

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  20. I love that you're living on the same land as your childhood! It can speak volumes about adventure! Your words took me back to my childhood summers spent similarly. My kids were raised the same, and my two little grandsons are, too. Many gifts arise from quiet...

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  21. Really enjoyed reading this, keeping kids off their screens can be a real battle these days. The best memories are made outdoors in nature x

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  22. I loved this!! I remember summer being an eternity of mud and playing. This was excellent.

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  23. I agree with everything you said. Unfortunately, the kids' summers today are not the same as when we grew up. Thanks for sharing.

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  24. What a beautiful post! It's definitely a good idea to keep screen time at a minimum for kids - while our backyard is small it has plenty of toys to keep the boys amused while they play, away from the TV! :)

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  25. My parents had a cure for boredom. If one of us ever said we were bored, they gave us chores to do. So much better to be outside, running around than to dare come inside and say the B word. Yes, my son had more screen time than I did, but he loved being outdoors rollerblading with his friends more.

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  26. Oh for a simpler life. lovely post.
    Sue from Sizzling Towards 60 & Beyond

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  27. I love this post! It should be read by every parent to realise there are more options for entertainment and getting some quality 'boring' time is essential. Great post and lucky kids.

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  28. This is truly important. Things are so different but we don't want to let go of what is meaningful and will never be forgotten.

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  29. Yes I resist the pressure to be doing constant activities and trips and scheduled time with the kids. I don't think it's that good for them. Kids need down time and normal time to just do simple things and develop. It is overwhelming for them to be constantly scheduled into activities I think.

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