Grace in the Giving

 My nine year old daughter could surely run her own bath, but she always asks me to do so still and I oblige with reverence. It feels like Mommy alchemy-the testing of the water temperature, shaking out the perfect amount of Epsom salts and lavender oil for her to wash off her day, draping a favorite towel over the sink for when she is done. 

Gone are the bath toys of yesterday and soon the simple task of asking Mommy to run a bath will also be gone. But, today I get to minister to my baby girl with a perfectly run bath and my heart sings in the giving of it.

Before You

Before you my worth seemed tenuous at best. I was always gathering proof of the unworthiness of my very existence.

Then came you. Suddenly, my worth was finite. Resolute.

For if I can make three such magnificent beings, if my own DNA can be twisted unto that of my husbands and make such glorious creatures-

then I surely must be more than the nothing that I have always imagined myself to be.

You did not make me whole. You made me realize that I have been whole all along.

People Watching

I watched the others around me. They were watching her too.

I could see that they were noticing her cherry red lipstick, freshly applied as she puckered her lips in her reflection in the mirror. Eyes focused upon her tiny, bright red skirt that barely covered her bottom. She noted their prying eyes and bent to pick up an imaginary something off of the floor, reveling in the attention.

Women were shooting angry glances as their husbands struggled to focus on the conversation at hand.  I could see into the minds of the men around me, imagining her confident prowess in the bedroom.

What I noticed was ever so different. She sat at the table alone, eyes roaming the room as if in wish of company. Her hands shook ever so gently and she kept spilling small amounts of her drink into her lap. I wondered if the shaking was nervousness, addiction or illness.

What I noticed most of all was the air of sadness all around her, as through she held so much melancholy inside of her that it could not remain trapped underneath her skin.

All is not as it often appears at first glance.

Look again. Look again. Rustle up the kindness within you for those that need it most, but appear at first glance to need it the least.

The Gift of Winter's Dormancy

I am a weathered, winter's tree.

Limbs stripped bare by the brutal winds, devoid of the life which once flowered upon me.

Arms cold.

Bare.

Shaking.

Outstretched to the sky in wait.

I lie desperate and willing for the green leaves of spring, longing for the fullness of life anew.

I feel that the dormancy of winter is heavily underrated. Loathed even.

Here in Iowa the winters are often brutally cold and send most of us into a hibernation of sorts for the bitter months. It is not uncommon during these times to log on to social media to see a myriad of fellow Midwesterners damning the winter in non-uncertain terms.

I admit to having some fairly horrid thoughts of my own during some the most brutal below-zero days. Especially in January, when I often get a debilitating case of the Januaries. You know The Januaries, right? When the cheer of the holidays has passed and you find yourself lost in the stark monotony of post-Christmas January?

I often find myself hunkering down for entire weekends, reading and journaling and turning into myself. This is where the winter dormancy gets good, Dear Ones. During those busy summer months, there is often little time for inner reflection.

Today, allow yourself the gift of winter's dormancy. Prepare your own fields for the surplus of the coming Spring. And, do not allow yourself to forget the promise of the warm sun is just around the bend.


Shine on. Inside and out, Dear Ones.

The Art of Zen Parenting: Dance it off!

How-to Shake Off a Bad Day

Everyone has bad days, right. EVERYONE. That, of course, includes our children. We, as parents, would love to protect them from the big, bad world but that is both impossible and unhealthy as they need to gain the skills to navigate the world while still in the protective comfort of childhood.

I have many techniques for helping my kiddos de-stress, but this is one of the favorites for my girls. My 13 year old son, however, is no longer such a fan. :)

When one of the girls(ages 9 and 5) have a rough day, we put on our "Happy" playlist and they pick an appropriate song. Then we belt the song out at the top of our lungs and dance wildly around our living room until we are dripping with sweat and out of breath from all of the giggling. It is impossible to stay in a funk after this, for both the girls and their Mama.

The girls often choose songs that I wouldn't have necessarily added to my iTunes list on my own. However, some of these unlikely songs have now become my go-to songs in the midst of a bad day.

Our current list includes some of the following:

Happy by Pharrell Williams(when we just need cheering up)



Shake It Off by Taylor Swift(to literally shake off a bad day)




We Are The Champions by Queen(to remind ourselves that we are, indeed, champions)




It is a super simple, fun way to transition from a lousy school/life day into a time of family togetherness. And, shaking your booty is a good workout as well.

What are your favorite songs to shake off a bad day?

Dive

I do not shy away from deep thoughts, challenging conversations.

I welcome them.

I loathe small talk. Talk with friends that you could be having with a stranger on the street.

I wish for conversations about what is heavy on your heart. What you think about late at night when you can't sleep.

The deep conversations that make you feel less alone, less different in this world.

Take a swim with me. Let us dive down underneath the shallow conversations of those around us. Deep into the cold, dark water to the warm, welcoming currents below. Let us stay here in this deep place and unburden our souls.

Come on in. The water is lovely.

Kindness

Be kind. Be kind. In all things be kind.

Shine on, Dear Ones.